Learning how to be good in bed is a process that doesn’t just happen overnight. It takes time to learn what works and what doesn’t work to please your man and fulfill him sexually.
But in case you don’t have time to read every single thing on this site, here are the main things that you absolutely must know if you are serious about giving your man maximum pleasure between the sheets the next time you are together.
1. Learn How To Give A Killer Blowjob
There are so many different things you can do during a blowjob with your man that sometimes a lot of girls forget about the most important thing that you need to do for every blowjob you give your man:
Loving It! This tip sounds a little cheesy, but it’s vital. When you give your man a blowjob a huge part to turning him on is being enthusiastic about it and enjoying it. In others words, Loving It! You probably feel the exact same when your man goes down on you.
It’s a real turn off when he acts repulsed. But when he really enjoys what he is doing, then you both enjoy it a whole lot more. So the next time you go down on your man, make sure to be more enthusiastic about it and make sure you also use some of the blowjob tips from the links above.
2. Learn How To Talk Dirty
Learning how to talk dirty may not be that important when you first start dating your man. But as the relationship progresses it is the perfect way to make things more interesting and hot!
Having discussed it with many students, one of the problems that I have noticed with learning how to talk dirty is using it the first few times with your man. You may be nervous or shy about using it (learn how to get over sexual anxiety one or for all) or you may feel like giggling or laughing when you say something dirty to your man to break the tension. That’s normal, but please understand that:
Talking dirty is so much more powerful when you can say something slowly and confidently without breaking the tension.
One super-hot way to talk dirty is to tell your man about your fantasies. Everyone has fantasies.
3. Learn Some New Sex Positions
If you are serious about figuring out how to be good in bed, then you need to learn some new sex positions. Most couples usually get into a routine for sex after their first few months of dating. They usually have sex at night before going to sleep and sometimes in the morning.
They usually have about 10 different positions that they run through but usually stick with just 3 or 4 for the most part. This routine is why men cheat. They get bored and they aren’t experiencing anything new and interesting. So my advice is to constantly stay learning.
There are so many ways to have sex that you won’t believe them all! You can have sex on the bed, the sofa or even in the laundry room. Try standing for shower sex.
4. Find Out What He Likes
I should probably have mentioned this first. A large part of being good in bed is learning what your partner likes. Maybe there are a few different positions he prefers more than any other position. Or maybe he likes it when you give him a blowjob in a certain way. Or he might hate it when you talk dirty to him, but he loves it when you dress up in some sexy lingerie.
Doing what he likes is more important than simply trying something new. Your focus should be on your partner. If you have a new partner in the future, you’ll need to focus on what he likes and not what your ex likes.
Sometimes you can tell what your man likes by judging his reactions. But the best way is to talk to him about his wants and desires. You may think of asking him point blank the very next time you are both together, but being put on the spot like this may make him clam up and feel embarrassed about it.
A better way to start talking about what he likes is to wait until you are both in bed together and talking about sex. Tell him what you enjoy the most. Then afterwards ask him what he enjoys the most.
Talking about sex is crucial for a satisfying sex life, but it’s definitely not easy.
Pay attention to his body language. Does he moan, buck his hips or start breathing faster? Or does he pull his body away from yours. Some men can be harder to read than others, of course.
Note that you don’t need to do everything he wants but being willing to try it out at least once will go a long way. You might find that you like some of those things, which leads me to my next point.
5. Get to Know Yourself
What’s hotter for your man than seeing you writhe in pleasure and, ultimately, orgasm? Women who know their own needs and desires tend to be better in bed.
When you know what you want – and ask for it, like I mentioned above – you’ll have a better time and be more engaged. Partners who are proactive are definitely better in bed. And you reap the benefit of getting your man to touch you the way you need.
The easiest way to get to know yourself is through masturbation. Focus on your clitoris, which is what brings most women pleasure.
Many women respond especially well to sex toys. Discover toys you can add to your nightstand for better sex. You can even use some of those toys with your man.
Find out what you like, then tell or show your man how to do those things to you when you’re in the throes of passion.
6. Be Spontaneous
Spontaneity is key to good sex. Simply switch things up and have sex in the morning rather than just before bed. If your man normally does the work, you can get on top and ride him.
If you’re the type who always has sex in the bedroom, try something new. Have sex on the couch or in the kitchen. Show your man that you can’t wait to get your clothes off and your hands on him.
Don’t be afraid to do it in the car or outside the house. Even if you rent a hotel room for the night, you can breathe new life into your sex life.
Surprise him with a sexy text when he’s at work. Slip a note into his lunchbox or greet him when he comes home while wearing nothing at all. As long as it’s out of the ordinary, it’ll pique his interest and supercharge your sex life.
Note there are some things you shouldn’t necessarily be spontaneous about, including prostate play. Many men like prostate play, but you should talk to him before you do anything about it.
7. Have Fun
It’s all about having fun and not comparing yourself to anyone else. If you’re having fun, your man will notice and he’ll have fun, too.
Learn to laugh in bed. Sex can be messy and awkward. If you’re uptight about it or make a big deal about the things that can naturally go wrong, then you might have a bad time.
But if you can laugh it off, something like queefing or an awkward position becomes a little deal that doesn’t sour the whole experience in anyone’s mind.
Remember, being good in bed isn’t about following a script. It’s about being you (your man chose you, after all!), just the you who is willing to explore and please your man. If you follow these steps in order every time, you’ll seem robotic and certainly not spontaneous. Chances are, you won’t have that much fun, either.
You don’t need to go down on your man every time or aim for a minimum number of sex positions as long as you’re having a good time. Nor must you fill every moment of silence with dirty talk. However, you want to pepper these things in naturally, so your sex life will never become mundane, and both you and your man will be satiated.
Your man will be impressed with how good you are in bed that he might even brag about you to his friends!